This Loss We Cannot Take
by GeneralEtnaTanaka
Summary: Lenalee died in battle against the Noah, and the Order is grief-stricken. Out of the lot, it was General Etna Tanaka who remained the strongest, being the soothing wave to comfort and eas everyone's pain, but how long until she breaks down herself?


"Allen-kun, are you okay?"  
The words spoken was filled with deep concern, brows furrowing over heteromatic orbs. Slowly, a hand reached out and placed itself upon his shoulders. And when his gray pools turned her way, it just near broke her heart. Golden and green orbs widened, before lids lowered halfway. A small smile formed at her lips, before she shifted and pulled him close. "Allen-kun, its going to be alright," she whispered to him, turning her face towards him. Kissing the top of his head in comfort, she had allowed a small sigh to pass through her lips, eyes closing completely now.

And then, he broke.

His shoulders shook with the grief as he buried his face into the General's shoulders, fingers clinging onto the fabrics of her uniform. The tears burned his eyes, creating streaks on his grit-covered face. His anguished sobs could rock the earth itself, and his only solace was the comfort of her arms. "E-Etna, I-I couldn't save her, I should have saved her!" The snowy-haired Exorcist cried as he collapsed into the arms of the woman he had come to love.

If it wasnt for her, he was sure that he'd be completely gone. Only she could help him pick up the pieces of his anguished heart. Somehow, she always knew the best things to say to cheer him up. Over the years that he knew Etna Tanaka, he had come to realize that she was his support. Without her, he'd just be... Lost.

"What am I going to tell Komui? And Lavi! Oh Etna, they will never forgive me," Allen shuddered as his eyes closed. What happened today will haunt him forever. The anguish of losing one of his best friends was completely excruciating. Though it wasn't as painful as when he thought he was going to lose Etna, it was pretty damn close.

Pulling away, he forced himself to take in a calming breath, before averting his gaze shamefully. He couldn't save Lenalee. He should have tried harder, even if it killed hi-.

He didn't get the chance to finish his thoughts.

"Hey, look at me," Etna spoke out in that soft yet authoritative tone. She didn't give him much of a choice, however, as she cupped his face in her warm hands and forced his eyes to hers. Heteromatic met slate dead in the eye, her lips pursed ever-so slightly, "No one will blame you," she whispered sternly yet comfortingly. "You did all that you could, nothing... You nor I.." Her voice cracked a bit, but than regained their strength. "Could have saved her," though she was probably just as anguished as he, she fought it back, kept herself in control.

But Allen knew very well that she was hurting inside. He knew that, despite the smile she constantly wore, she was just as broken as he was. And that was why they needed eachother. They needed one-another to keep themselves strong. But, if he went through the things Etna had, growing up within the Order, he wasn't sure if he could maintain his optimistic illusion.

Slowly, with the fluid grace of a cat, Etna stood to her feet, hand finding his as she did so, "C' mon, we.. We should get going," she whispered softly, lips trembling into a smile. Her heteromatic orbs glistened slightly with the onset of tears. He could tell by the subtle shaking of her strong hands that she was trying desperetally to keep herself together. Etna took in a shuddered breath as her eyes closed, a single tear escaping through thick lashes.

"Etna-chan, are you okay?" Allen asked, repeating her earlier question. His thumb stroked comfortingly along the meat of her palm, before curling his fingers around her hand, giving her a firm squeeze. Together, in silence, the two picked their way through the bloody battle-field, hearts struck with grief. The Innocence of Lenalee Lee, which thankfully survived the battle against the Noah, burned like fire against the General's pocket.

"The worlds lost another continent," the two muttered bitterly amongst themselves as their parting words to their list friend.


End file.
